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Old 08-19-2009, 08:13 PM   #1
miss-communicator
 
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I'm a Female
Living in spokane

Repaired relationship(s)...

I just have to post in regards to them:


i personally LOVED my inlaws- all of em. So when I went thru a divorce and never heard from them again, I was devistated. I still wrote xmas cards, made a few phone calls, only to feel rejected by em all.
4 years have passed since then. I totally went thru the emotions of loss, rejection, anger, etc. I tried to be understanding of "loyality", but i was sooo hurt, as I had been a part of this family for 13 years! And in just a matter of days, I was dismissed just like that.

Anyways, a few days ago, my ex sister in law reached out via FB. She called the other day- we couldnt talk, just cried for 10 minutes (like blubbering idiots). By the time we could talk, it was I love, I miss, etc. I have to say I took great joy in knowing they hated his new wife and wished I was still a part of their family.

This week....I had 4 years of heartache totally heal in a matter of minutes. No one has been able to wipe the shit eating grin off my face. Its funny what "closure" can do for the soul.

So for you, if any, has been yours with the in-laws. or maybe not even them, how bout just repairing/healing from a major loss??

Last edited by Rockerchic; 08-19-2009 at 08:15 PM.
 
Old 08-19-2009, 08:36 PM   #2
Rezident Cynik
 
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I'm a Gentleman
Living in Various Locations in WA
Humor is Dry/Sarcastic

Closure....hmm.

That's a toughy. All too often, they just....go away. I still wonder about some of my exes, where they are, what they are doing, if they ever found anyone to make them happy.

Hell, there's at least one that I wonder if she's still alive.

As for the families....man. That's tough, too. There was a young lady whose family helped me out when I was having a hard time...gave me a place to live, fed me, looked after me. They didn't know she and I were sleeping together (though I think they may have suspected). I had no way of repaying them for their kindness...and for the part I played in their daughter's life, I feel as though I betrayed them. I haven't talked to them in a long time. I'm ashamed for not being able to thank them properly for all they did, and now I'm even more ashamed for just disappearing. They were the most wonderful people.

I'm not sure exactly how it is I cope with major loss; I kinda just.....go on. I've lost a lot of friends, a lot of family, a lot of the things I worked to accomplish in the last couple years. After a while, one just takes it in stride. I pretty much live day to day anymore.

Hehe....back in 2007, I remember there was about a month and a half that was just brutal. My girl left me, then 2 weeks later my dog got hit by a car, 2 weeks after that, my best friend told me his doctor thought he may have thyroid cancer. I joked that I should have written a country song about it. This was all shortly after my bike wreck, and I was laid up and couldn't work, had no money......

Meh, life goes on. There's no point in giving up. Happiness may be fleeting, but it's still out there. I'll gladly endure months of pain, loneliness, poverty, for the opportunity to feel a little bit of joy, of love, of beauty. Life can really suck sometimes, but from what I hear, it beats the hell out of the alternative.
 
Old 08-19-2009, 09:34 PM   #3
Litte Mary Sunshine
 
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I'm a Girl
Living in just this of side of hell

great question and very tough call RC.. I TRY not to have any contact with the ex (we all remember, the asshole that ripped my beating heart out of my chest). It's on you babe, what can YOU handle. I personally can't handle it so I don't, I know my limits. If I get close, someone dies. I KNOW I can't emotionally handle it. Trust your instincts, you can't go wrong with instincts.
 
Old 08-19-2009, 09:57 PM   #4
Engineer of the Love Boat
 
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I'm a Guy
Living in One in Washington

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bikenut View Post
great question and very tough call RC.. I TRY not to have any contact with the ex (we all remember, the asshole that ripped my beating heart out of my chest). It's on you babe, what can YOU handle. I personally can't handle it so I don't, I know my limits. If I get close, someone dies. I KNOW I can't emotionally handle it. Trust your instincts, you can't go wrong with instincts.
, I know I personally can't handle talking with an ex's family but I do know some people that are great friends with an ex's fam. It's all up to the individual.
 
Old 08-20-2009, 05:19 AM   #5
Married and then some.
 
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I'm a Female
Living in Crazytown
Looking for Conversation
Humor is Goofy
Have a Unique fashion style

I'm glad you finally got closure RC and you allowed yourself to heal. as for me it usually takes time and lots of it. I have a tendency to lock my pain away and when it eventually breaks through I deal with it, sometimes well sometimes not. At times I just lock it back up again and go on. It frustrates me because I see the pain as the ego of me, instead of I am because I choose to be.
 
Old 08-27-2009, 12:06 PM   #6
PNW Love Member
 
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Living in Sequim - Yeah, Baby!

'When one door closes.... I am going to lock it behind you.
 
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