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Old 05-03-2009, 10:00 AM   #1
miss-communicator
 
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I'm a Female
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Question Sacrifice or compromise?

or neither?

What and when does changing your lifestyle for someone and your relationship become unhealthy?
Anyone know what I'm talking about? Advice? I'm more than happy to give up certain aspects of the "old me" to work on a "new Us". I'm just not sure where to draw the line (if there even is one)

Last edited by Rockerchic; 05-03-2009 at 10:04 AM.
 
Old 05-03-2009, 01:11 PM   #2
Married and then some.
 
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I do know what your talking about, compromise is always necessary in a relationship. Yes, you do need to draw a line or you will loose yourself and be miserable. The little things someone does thats just part of who they are, it may drive you up a wall at times but look the other way and carry on. The big things more than likely they knew the whole you to begin with so why are they trying to change you. Health reasons I can see that but they still need to respect that you are in charge of you. You can tell anyone anything in the right way but its up to them if they choose to change it and its up to you to decide if you can live with it. For me its not about what I can live with its about what I don't want to live with out. No ones perfect and no one should expect someone to be perfect. Hope that helps a little in some way.
 
Old 05-03-2009, 02:53 PM   #3
Litte Mary Sunshine
 
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ohhh aweseome question! Being dating retarded I have no clue but still awesome question.

pssst, when you figure it out will ya let me know - thanks ;)
 
Old 05-03-2009, 08:21 PM   #4
So Amazingly Happy
 
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Hmm.. where to draw the line? I would say it would be when you feel like you can't be yourself. Yes - we all need to make some small adjustments or tweeks in relationships - but you should ALWAYS be able to be yourself. Just don't lose "YOU" because you are pretty awesome!
 
Old 05-03-2009, 10:05 PM   #5
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Compromise, coexist, complement, but at the end of the day you have to remain yourself. If you don't, it's very likely you won't like the person that's looking back at you in a mirror. And then you will be miserable, and make everybody around you miserable. And then we will have to take you out back and ...
 
Old 05-04-2009, 07:38 AM   #6
Married and then some.
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jjoker View Post
And then we will have to take you out back and ...
Sorry RC off the subject for a moment...Why is it always take you out back? Why is it not take you out front, take you to the side or where you stand? I was a fool and asked my dad this very question he thought I was being a smart ass and took me out back and beat my butt OK carry on.
 
Old 05-04-2009, 08:08 AM   #7
Random Fact Man
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MrsD View Post
...Why is it always take you out back?
Cause if you took it out front, it would be a spectacle... if you take it out back - it's just bussines
 
Old 05-04-2009, 08:44 AM   #8
~Messy Baby~
 
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I don't know. Bad experience with "compromise". To me the defintion of "Compromise" is one person will get their way, and the other will not.

I "compromised" a lot in the past and well, I just don't want to anymore. So long story short, I haz no clue what the answer is. I figure when I'm with someone that is worth a damn, it will not be such a big deal, cause there would be actual "Compromise" going on. Til then, I do what I want, and no one is going to tell me different.
 
Old 05-04-2009, 12:27 PM   #9
Random Fact Man
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TeashaMae View Post
I don't know. Bad experience with "compromise". To me the defintion of "Compromise" is one person will get their way, and the other will not.
In my book that's giving up.

Compromise should be a skilful negotiation, after which both parties are satisfied with the result.

Btw - it's not fair to try to negotiate with a guy right before, during, and right after sex.... cause we're clearly not thinging with the right head...
 
Old 05-04-2009, 12:56 PM   #10
Married and then some.
 
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^^^that's because you can't its a well known fact Men only have enough blood to run one head at a time.
 
Old 05-04-2009, 01:00 PM   #11
~Messy Baby~
 
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I'm a Chicky-poo
Living in my own reality....

Quote:
Originally Posted by jjoker View Post
In my book that's giving up.

Compromise should be a skilful negotiation, after which both parties are satisfied with the result.

Btw - it's not fair to try to negotiate with a guy right before, during, and right after sex.... cause we're clearly not thinging with the right head...
At the time it was happening, I didn't think of it as giving up, I thought I was just trying to do right by my relationship and do what I could to make it work.

Of course looking back, yup, I sure was giving up, nothing I did was good enough, so I thought I would try it his way to make him happy....guess what? I don't give a flying rats ass now
 
Old 05-04-2009, 01:15 PM   #12
Sarah's little mermaid
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MrsD View Post
^^^that's because you can't its a well known fact Men only have enough blood to run one head at a time.
....YEP
 
Old 05-04-2009, 01:45 PM   #13
Random Fact Man
 
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I'm a Gentleman
Living in Spokane

Quote:
Originally Posted by MrsD View Post
^^^that's because you can't its a well known fact Men only have enough blood to run one head at a time.
Sheeeet... you ain't gotta tell me, know whatIamsayin'
 
Old 05-04-2009, 04:38 PM   #14
Litte Mary Sunshine
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TeashaMae View Post
I don't know. Bad experience with "compromise". To me the defintion of "Compromise" is one person will get their way, and the other will not.

I "compromised" a lot in the past and well, I just don't want to anymore. So long story short, I haz no clue what the answer is. I figure when I'm with someone that is worth a damn, it will not be such a big deal, cause there would be actual "Compromise" going on. Til then, I do what I want, and no one is going to tell me different.
I love you I don't think you gave up at ALL, quite the opposite, you put so much of yourself into it and got nothing back. That's not failure from where I stand. It shows you are willing to give it your all!
 
Old 05-04-2009, 05:57 PM   #15
~Messy Baby~
 
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I'm a Chicky-poo
Living in my own reality....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bikenut View Post
I love you I don't think you gave up at ALL, quite the opposite, you put so much of yourself into it and got nothing back. That's not failure from where I stand. It shows you are willing to give it your all!
 
Old 05-04-2009, 06:21 PM   #16
Litte Mary Sunshine
 
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Living in just this of side of hell

pftttt...don't kiss me. You held our own when most would crumble. My respect don't mean shit. It's the fact that you got respect for YOURSELF. That's all we got sometimes. You are a great role model
 
Old 05-04-2009, 06:27 PM   #17
Sleepnowinthefire
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MrsD View Post
^^^that's because you can't its a well known fact Men only have enough blood to run one head at a time.
Aren't you lucky that we know what head to run when it counts
 
Old 05-05-2009, 06:35 PM   #18
PNW Love Member
 
I'm a Dude
Living in somewhere

Sacrifice or Compromise......

Neither...

I`m me and thats who i`ll be.... If I start a relationship you better like "me"
Cause I will not change who I am for anyone
 
Old 09-13-2009, 12:50 AM   #19
PNW Love Member
 
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I'm a Dude
Living in Sequim - Yeah, Baby!

I would rather go without than to settle, compromize or give in.
I've raised my standards.... its time to up yours.
 
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