I think when we go through divorce, we all want to make sure we're successful and prove that we can move forward. For me, it was showing I could still maintain my business, own beautiful things, laugh with the most friends, and finally, reside in a loving home. I found my "home" 2 years after my divorce. Before that, I had lived in a 800sq ft apt (after living in 2500sf home with "him".)
It was out in the country- 5 acres of peace and quiet, and oh yeah, big and beautiful....

I have a habit of getting stuck...
Change? I hate it. Especially if I'm running in that zone we call comfort. If something is working, even just remotely, why change it? So without this "change", i tend to get bored. But I choose not to change anything- instead i decide on "disrupting" this so called path I'm on. Ruffle the feathers, stir the pot, rock the boat- these are all terms that can describe me...and that doesnt make em good.
Well its been mentioned here...

what makes a day feel good or bad? Was it how you slept or didn't sleep thru the night. Is it that ur hair and/clothes don't look "just right"? Did someone say or do something to affect your mood? It seems at some point one or all of these things can make or break your day. Very rarely do I wake up and just decide to have a shitty day. I never wake up and hit the snooze over and over again cuz I dread what the day may bring. I feel quite fortunate knowing that even if my day starts out...

Well its my last night to drink. Tomorrow I'm eliminating alcohol 'cept for some holiday cheers here and there.

I'm gonna stay put at home and see if I get any trick or treaters. I think I'm too far off the beatin path to get any. But going out in costume tonight just doesnt sound fun. Maybe I am getting old and boring.

Tomorrow is golf. woot woot! I havent done enough of it this year. Funny how the things that you enjoy and make u smile are usually the first to go...

grrr. I am tonight. I just wanna cry- okay, so I am. I do not understand how something so simple as showing someone how easy it is to LIVE a happy stress free relationship can turn into a tipped over bucket of sheeeeeeeeeeeeot. I'm pissed, frusterated, sad in a kick em in the fuckin head kinda way. i'M having a serious visit about "life" and the fucker just starts snoring....for realz?

Of course there's a bigger picture, but somehow that seems to sum it up for me for now....