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Old 01-14-2009, 11:44 PM   #1
Doctor of Love...Ask away
 
Wild Angel's Avatar
 
I'm a Lady
Living in Spokane WA.

I need some insite OMG

Hey you all I need some of your great insite from men and women..

Okay issue dropped

Thanks guys

Last edited by Wild Angel; 01-18-2009 at 09:08 PM.
 
Old 01-14-2009, 11:55 PM   #2
PNW Love Member
 
I'm a Dude
Living in somewhere

Communicate......

Yes time has pasted but feelings never do change if you don't want them too. He loved you 11yrs ago, knows that he messed up and doesn't want to lose that again.
If you want something to happen NOW with him, sit him down and be like... I`m glad that we are back in touch, I enjoy our time together as I believe you do too... ( Good stuff first ).... Just be blunt, if he`s 45 yrs old, bluntness gets to the point and that is what he needs.
Be like we we talk on the phone, before we get done talking.. You say " I love You", I dont know how you handle that this quick. I do love you in my life, but dont know if I can say it in a relationship way. Then ask him is that what he is entailing?

He will tell you yes or no.... If no, then he is doing it feeling basis as he is glad you are back in is life. If Yes, explain that you want to see if these past 11yrs have changed you and are willing to give that a shot.
Your not going to break his heart by clarifying his intentions.... As long as you don't run away and say don't talk to me anymore


EDIT:
After re-reading.....
He has feelings for you, obviously you do too..... If he is a changed man, he will respect your request to ez-down with the "I love you"... Just ask for time to show that he has changed.

Last edited by Mikercw; 01-15-2009 at 12:05 AM.
 
Old 01-15-2009, 07:48 AM   #3
So Amazingly Happy
 
Washingtonblonde's Avatar
 
I'm a Lady
Living in Lacey, WA

Scary territory. Just be cautious. That's my only 2 cents. I personally don't have an ex that I would go back to so I can't speak from my own experiences.
 
Old 01-15-2009, 08:18 AM   #4
Sleepnowinthefire
 
Dragonfish's Avatar
 
I'm a Guy
Living in Olympia

Good luck and Gods speed
 
Old 01-15-2009, 08:34 AM   #5
Today I choose Life
 
CStyle's Avatar
 
I'm a Gentleman
Living in Marital Bliss...

This is very interesting to me. I know for me personally that every woman that I have truly loved, they still hold a special place in my heart. Which consists of 3 women. I don't doubt that he still loves you in some way. In order for a person to truly change, there usually has to be some sort of spiritual or psychic change that takes place in that persons life. I know from experience that this is very real. It sounds like something major has happened in his life that caused him to reevaluate the way he was living. I agree with Mike on the fact that you just need to talk to him about this. Ask what his intentions are, let him know that you are feeling uncomfortable. This is a good time to broach these subjects, especially since you just started seeing each other again, and are not deep into the relationship. Good luck, your in my prayers.
 
Old 01-15-2009, 05:18 PM   #6
Litte Mary Sunshine
 
Bikenut's Avatar
 
I'm a Girl
Living in just this of side of hell

I personally would be more concerned of why you felt compelled to contact someone 11 years later after a bad experience with the said stated ass? Granted, I didn't date Rene' for two years but we were in constant contact as friends and supported his racing with helping him.

I'm not trying to skirt around the issue, but we all have personalties on any forum. I always get the impression your 'wanting' someone. This is a bad mind set to enter into a relationship. It can really lead to you 'overlooking' some pretty bad qualities in lieu of just being in a relationship. Just from reading some of your posts, I say don't be jumping all over this guy and seeing unicorns and rainbows. If he has really changed, there is no justifiable rush. Just relax and see how things go. As a side note, you have kids. I was extremly careful in dating when my children were young. It's hard for them if you get hot and heavy with this guy, and then all of a sudden all hell breaks loose. It just really concerns me you have kids, you state this guy was an ass and your willing to just jump into a relationship with him.

I'm with Sarah, your kids need to be your first concern so whatever you decide to do, err of the side of caution. And I would never contact an ex after 11 years either. This whole thing just sounds fishy to me.
 
Old 01-16-2009, 08:42 AM   #7
Doctor of Love...Ask away
 
Wild Angel's Avatar
 
I'm a Lady
Living in Spokane WA.

WEll we were friends after the break up but then I met my now EX Husband he was not wanting me to be friends with ANYONE so we lost contact. I did not think he was all that of an ASS those were his words he treated me pretty well. He just was an ass at times with my daughter because his daughter was close to her age and everyone favs. their own kid first. I also felt at the time he was still in love with the motehr of his daughter and knew there was no room in his heart to place me first I was second so I left.
I am NOW WAY jumping into the relationship that is why it freaks me out with all the love stuff. I contacted him to catch up on times I had no direct intentions to date him I am to protective of my feelings and I am way picky to settle I know I deserve to be treated like a queen as I always treat my men like a KING.
I NEVER have any guy I am dating around my kids I will only have them meet the guy if they are worth meeting once I have dated for a few months and it seems to be going someplace.

Thanks for the insite...yes I want someone as everyone does but I also do not want someone that is all hot n heavy in my life I am to busy for that "needy" person. My Kids first, My work second, then a boyfriend even with my personal time of things I like to do for myself.
 
Old 01-16-2009, 09:55 AM   #8
Down the Rabbit Hole
 
Metonymy's Avatar
 
I'm a Gentleman
Living in Washington

Quote:
Originally Posted by Washingtonblonde View Post
I personally don't have an ex that I would go back to so I can't speak from my own experiences.
Bingo. Ex's are ex's for a reason. Let bygones be bygones.

P.S. - Why do you still have the phone number of someone you broke up with over a decade ago?
 
Old 01-16-2009, 11:57 AM   #9
Litte Mary Sunshine
 
Bikenut's Avatar
 
I'm a Girl
Living in just this of side of hell

I'm not bashing you dude. You asked our opinion. I just think woman tend to see potential relationships with rose colored glasses. Especially since you've stated before that you are obsessed with being with a man and how much you'd like to find someone. Can you see how that can lead us to see a major red flag being hoisted. If there were problems before because his daughter is close to your daughter's age, well, logically I don't see what has changed there. And if has commitment issues, why even bother. Again, I'm not bashing you, maybe it's just me, but don't you think there is something just a little funny about some dude from 11 years ago proffessing all this love for you? Common sense is tellling me if he you loves you so much, where the hell as he been for 11 years
 
Old 01-16-2009, 06:03 PM   #10
Married and then some.
 
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I'm a Female
Living in Crazytown
Looking for Conversation
Humor is Goofy
Have a Unique fashion style

Time out...Bikenut.. D.. when did you become a thread killer??
 
Old 01-16-2009, 06:55 PM   #11
Doctor of Love...Ask away
 
Wild Angel's Avatar
 
I'm a Lady
Living in Spokane WA.

Okay obsession and wanting a man was a JOKE!!
but it takes getting to know me to understand that. I really do not have a man relationship obsession If I did I could have had MANY but I am picky and not needy.

And his number was in the phone book yup there is still a phone book!!

BTW update on the I love you issue the whole focus of the question...The second time he said it I over talked him with a "Okay I will talk to you tomorrow" and have yet to hear anymore of I love you words from him since!!

SO, I think he cought the clue I do not move that fast!and realized it was fast to say that.
So to all thank you for the chat advise and understanding of how people judge or jeiw others on here with out fully understanding or knowing someone...I will post JK after my joking comments I am very sarcastice and a BIG time JOKESTER!! BTW!!
 
Old 01-16-2009, 08:05 PM   #12
Litte Mary Sunshine
 
Bikenut's Avatar
 
I'm a Girl
Living in just this of side of hell

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wild Angel View Post
Okay obsession and wanting a man was a JOKE!!
but it takes getting to know me to understand that. I really do not have a man relationship obsession If I did I could have had MANY but I am picky and not needy.

And his number was in the phone book yup there is still a phone book!!

BTW update on the I love you issue the whole focus of the question...The second time he said it I over talked him with a "Okay I will talk to you tomorrow" and have yet to hear anymore of I love you words from him since!!

SO, I think he cought the clue I do not move that fast!and realized it was fast to say that.
So to all thank you for the chat advise and understanding of how people judge or jeiw others on here with out fully understanding or knowing someone...I will post JK after my joking comments I am very sarcastice and a BIG time JOKESTER!! BTW!!
easy does it. No need for the defense. I can't say it enough, what you POST is what we KNOW. Does that make sense. For the umptenth time, I'm not bashing you. And NO ONE made a judgement against you. It's the interdrama. We don't FULLY understand ANYONE on the web, only what THEY post. I really hope you can understand that. Can you see the contradiction? Days ago he professed all this love and now, per you, he has never said it again.

All I'm saying is I'm confused as shit.
 
Old 01-16-2009, 08:34 PM   #13
Litte Mary Sunshine
 
Bikenut's Avatar
 
I'm a Girl
Living in just this of side of hell

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wild Angel View Post
Okay obsession and wanting a man was a JOKE!!
but it takes getting to know me to understand that. I really do not have a man relationship obsession If I did I could have had MANY but I am picky and not needy.

And his number was in the phone book yup there is still a phone book!!

BTW update on the I love you issue the whole focus of the question...The second time he said it I over talked him with a "Okay I will talk to you tomorrow" and have yet to hear anymore of I love you words from him since!!

SO, I think he cought the clue I do not move that fast!and realized it was fast to say that.
So to all thank you for the chat advise and understanding of how people judge or jeiw others on here with out fully understanding or knowing someone...I will post JK after my joking comments I am very sarcastice and a BIG time JOKESTER!! BTW!!
easy does it. No need for the defense. I can't say it enough, what you POST is what we KNOW. Does that make sense. For the umptenth time, I'm not bashing you. And NO ONE made a judgement against you. It's the interdrama. We don't FULLY understand ANYONE on the web, only what THEY post. I really hope you can understand that. Can you see the contradiction? Days ago he professed all this love and now, per you, he has never said it again.

All I'm saying is I'm confused as shit. I really try to get to know people on all my forums, but you really fail to state WHO you are. Let's just leave it to PM's. Again, if you feel judged, that's on you. You can't post about husbands kicking their kids and leaving their wives to come see you and wanting pain in a relationship and then want all this respect. Bottom line, do what ya want. I'm tough. Your right, I'm wrong.I gotta go mow my lawn. Have a nice day.
 
Old 08-07-2009, 03:03 PM   #14
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I'm a Dude
Living in Sequim - Yeah, Baby!

Go Ride, Be Happy,


Everything else is just background ambient chatter.
 
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